things i like to keep to myself.

1. you've become ridiculously annoying trying to one-up everyone.
2. i wish people can see how much of a trick you really are.
3. stop walking in & out of my life. stay in or stay out.
4. you're my favorite b/c you've kept in touch even though i left.
5. they've changed you & you don't even know it.
6. i wonder what would happen if we crossed paths.
7. let's talk about something/one else besides yourself.
8. your new girlfriend makes you forget about me. real talk.
9. we will never be the same & i don't know who's fault it is.

*inhales.

10. it's been years & it shouldn't bother me anymore, but it still does. all. the. fucking. time. why can't i get the balls to tell you that i'm sorry to your face? i need to just man up, but i can't. i'm too afraid of what you'll say or do. i'm afraid that you'll say "fuck you" & walk away. we're okay now though, aren't we? i don't think we are. we're just acquaintances. we're not friends. we used to be friends, until i messed that up. i still get freaking sad every time i think about you. about us. about how we used to be so chill. come. on. give me a sign telling me that it's really okay. really. okay.

*waiting to exhale.